Believing on purpose is the foundation of every success in life. Every achievement in life is worked for. Nothing works itself, just like no problem solves itself.

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One of the frustration people are facing is from a relationship. Your happiness can be controlled due to the kind of relationship you are into.

But the good news is that relationship is by choice, therefore, you have the power to control your happiness when it comes to the subject of a relationship.

People take their time in everything but when it comes to relationships we just want to rush into it without spending adequate time on what we want. That is why the rate of divorce in marriage is on the increase.

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I will like us to know that your singleness is a very crucial stage when it comes to what determines your destiny in marriage.

Relationship can be corrected if it hasn’t graduated to marriage. Even though marrying the wrong person can be corrected by divorce in which we feel it’s normal. But the mistake of marrying the wrong person initially will always leave a scare on both partners.

There are seven vital steps you must take to lead us into a successful marriage outcome.


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This step is not that you are taking the person right to the altar for marriage. It simply letting your intention known to the person you want to ask out. This step should also inform your choice of who to marry. Such as; do you agree with his/her personality, style or outlook?

Can two walk together, except they be agreed?

Amos 3:3 KJV

Please! Your decision on who to marry should not be based on dreams. I have had several encounters with some ladies who will come and tell me they had a dream and God showed them that I am their future husband. I will just laugh inside of me because most times they are never my choice firstly from their outlook let alone style or personality.

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Your decision should be based on articulated facts such as; do we have the same goal? are we going in the same direction? is her character suitable for me to handle?


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When the response from the other party is positive then preparation begins. This is an in-depth fact-finding period when the man and lady start getting to know themselves and begin to put their facts together into the future they both anticipate.

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Breaking an engagement is spiritually permitted. Saying ‘Yes’ to a marriage proposal is different from saying ‘yes’ in actual marriage. Many tolerated themselves during their engagement period and eventually get married, and thereafter enter into crisis.

The marriage preparation is not just in prayers, but in fact-finding and intelligent analysis of available facts, to determine whether there is any future in the decision to marry.


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This is informing those who need to be informed. You are not permitted to proceed until you are satisfied with the available facts. We must spend adequate time before we proceed to inform anybody.

This is where most people miss it, they never engage adequate preparation time before proceeding.


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This is the stage whereby you are sure of settling down with the person. You begin to take practical steps toward getting married by putting the necessary things for marriage in place.

It is the sole responsibility of the man to get the apartment where he and his wife will call home. Since women are created to be the man helpmate which connotes support. The woman can also support the man in making the home ready for their living.

This can also be a test to know a supportive spouse. Age is not what determines your preparedness for marriage. What you have not prepared for can’t succeed in.


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You must protect your destiny by protecting yourselves from defilement. Defilement of the bed is the defilement of marital destiny.

Marriage is honorable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge.

Hebrews 13:4 KJV

Temptation is not equal to sin. Falling into temptation is what is termed in.


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This is the time to say “No” to any unpleasant or unacceptable issue you may have discovered in each other.

If you can’t understand yourselves well before you get married and start living together, you will never have an outstanding family.


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This is the final stage where you are sure of the person you want to marry. Your decision here counts because if you are responsible for your choice, you won’t look for someone to blame.

Conclusion: When trying to decide who to marry, never choose to marry an unbeliever no matter the vision, dream or counsel. The Abrahamic covenant demands that you marry among your kinsmen only. And as a believer, your kinsmen is a fellow believer. Divorce should never be given any place in our decision when seeking help. Therefore, we must spend adequate time considering all the listed steps before going into marriage.

Feel free to share your take. We are all learning together.

Jesus is Lord!


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